Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Let Them Eat Cake


It has been eight days. My sneakers sliding in the back seat of my car, sports bra on the floor, my gym shorts and shirt only used to cover my MP3 player as I unapologetically return the clothes I bought for my trip to Las Vegas. I have been seriously intending to pay my respects to the eliptical machine. My body is starting to show signs of excercise withdrawl. I really, really want to go to the gym. I am just bombarded with tasks such as well, shopping for lip gloss on ebay, exfoliating, trying to watch all of The Colbert Report...
I accepted store credit instead of complete refunds for almost $175 worth of $10 halter tops...bitterly. Clearly, I could have returned these items in accordance with the return policy considering I had been driving around with the unworn items for two weeks. If I really wanted to. What the hell do I really want? It has taken me more than a week and an extra 3 hours in front of my lap top to say this. While eating my third slice of my little brother's birthday cake I find it in my heart to admit that I am not indecisive, I just refuse to decide. I don't think I should have to.
They say you can't have your cake and eat it. Well, why the hell not? Who doesn't like cake? I have been slow to admit that I want it all and quite frankly I can't apologize for it. I see many with full jaws and cake filled hands. Why should people get their panties in a bunch about me? Can't I sleep until 10:30 am and still have 24 hours in a day? Eat that extra chicken quesadilla and not gain 5 pounds? Can't I still want my ex to fall in love with me and not have to admit to being in love with him? Be a bit um, freaky with my man and he not HAVE to ask who else I've done that to?

Many say no, however, I've seen buttercreme icing in the crevices of many smug grins.

I want to be a Ph.D in political science, own a construction company, travel the world, grace the cover of Vogue, just once. I want 4 children and a successful husband that can be home by 5:30pm everyday, like my daddy. I want to beable to make a great deal of money and he still want to handle the check at dinner. Can't I have a boyfriend that is completely over his ex? Can't I have a slim stomach without doing sit-ups? Wait until the last minute to do my assignments and still make A's? Return lingerie to Victoria Secret 60 days after purchase, when I have given up all hope of ever wearing it? I should, dammit. How many times has someone taken advantage of you? How many times has someone wanted all the benefits of a relationship but no commitment? Slacked off on a group project? Pressed you for cheating yet seeing someone else the whole time? I believe everyone wants to have their cake and eat it too? Why give up that extra piece of cake? It's either you or them and to be honest, I love cake.

I encourage others to not settle for anything less than what they want, even if you want EVERYTHING. There shouldn't be anything wrong with that. Only you HAVE to make it to the gym, buttercreme icing is fattening as hell.
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11 comments:

  1. Preach! Couldn't have said or written it better or funnier myself!

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  2. Anonymous6:55 PM

    Girl I have some past season boyshorts just collecting dust in the drawer...and I could use the 25 bucks.

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  3. Boxers-Almighty10:50 PM

    I think ice cream cakes are less fattening.

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  4. Anonymous1:10 AM

    Yes, you too can have it all! Who are you? Kimora Lee now? Hehehe

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  5. butter creme is my favorite cake however there are no butter creme cake making bakeries here.... so I can't even have the damn cake right now, but other times (like when I visit florida) I can, courtesy of publix, you can have everything you want in life... just not always at the same time

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  6. i like ice cream cake personally... i'm not over my ex and yeah you have to do situps...sorry. ph D in political science... hmm <3

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  7. Well written! I'm with you. I've settled before, now I'm holding out for everything I want.

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  8. Anonymous5:49 PM

    Very nice! I found a place where you can
    make some nice extra cash secret shopping. Just go to the site below
    and put in your zip to see what's available in your area.
    I made over $900 last month having fun!
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    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous9:09 PM

    Very nice! I found a place where you can
    make some nice extra cash secret shopping. Just go to the site below
    and put in your zip to see what's available in your area.
    I made over $900 last month having fun!
    make extra money

    ReplyDelete
  10. How many times has someone wanted all the benefits of a relationship but no commitment?

    ans - too many, im a victim of such

    ReplyDelete
  11. did somebody say cake?
    i always want the benefits of relationshp without the committment!

    ReplyDelete

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